Suzie Shooter

That awkward moment when you realise your kitchen ceiling and walls are covered in hundreds of fucking baby spiders.

Ugh ugh ugh.

Went to do the washing-up, saw one hanging over the sink, thought 'ok, money-spider, I can deal' - took it into the garden, came back. Realised there was another one hanging Off My Hair. May have flailed slightly.

Then made the mistake of looking up.

They were ALL OVER the ceiling and above the window and on the walls and it was like a (okay fairly non threatening, but hey I hate them and you don't know how big they might get) horror film.

Fortunately I had to hand a plastic brush thing on a long pole and relocated them in vile hanging clouds to the garden. There may have been some casualties. But that's what you get for crawling over my calendar of the boys, bitches.

In summary: ugh. Now I feel all itchy and creepy. I need a drink. And possibly a flamethrower.

ETA: I keep finding themmmmm. (I have just shouted "Fuck off my utensils!!" The neighbours now probably think I'm nuts.)

Tried to post this yesterday, but LJ wasn't having it. Trying again. Right, fine, fuck you LJ, here have a bloody link instead. Because it was epically epic.

The Interceptors.

In other news, I went back to work after one day off sick and had to fill in a three-page return to work form. WTF?

How much do I NOT want to play this?
interactive chlamydia? er, no thanks.
Ah, the dubious benefits of healthcare mailing lists...*dies laughing*

Ooh, and a belated thank you to nimnod and lifevolutionary for my pretty snowflakes!